Captain Underpants and the Vile Vengeance of the Venomous Plant Lady
by bloodrosered
Summary: Avery Winston is a military brat who befriends George Beard and Harold Hutchins at Jerome Horowitz Elementary. Meanwhile, Mr. Krupp unknowingly hires a new science teacher, Patricia Botony, who happens to have revenge on her mind.


Avery Winston was an average fourth grader. Well, not exactly. You see, Avery hated being a girly. She hated dresses. She hated bows. She hated dolls. And she HATED playing with girls.

Avery preferred to read comic books, playing in the mud, climbing trees, even playing jokes. In fact, her pranks often were carefully planned. She rarely got in trouble since she was rarely suspected-given that she was a girl

Avery had dark hair, dark eyes with her face smattered with freckles. Her hair was short and she wore overalls. Often people mistook her for a boy because of the way she dressed.

Avery sighed as she looked at her new school. A new life.

Jerome Horwitz Elementary School looked very boring. Nonetheless, Avery was used to boring, being a military brat. Her parents had divorced last year. Her mom decided she couldn't stand the moving around and decided to stay in Phoenix, Arizona. She was already dating another man last Avery heard. She was free spirited and too flighty to take care of Avery. Her father was a neurosurgeon in the Air Force. Lately they had moved to Piqua, Ohio on his newest assignment.

Her Dad encouraged her to be herself, yet he insisted on certain aspects of the military life. Always be neat. Have discipline. Yet she didn't really like any of that.

* * *

Patricia Botony had saw an ad in the paper for a new science teacher. Flipping her red hair over her shoulder, she smirked. She could use a little excitement in her life. She figured her botany degree wasn't getting her anywhere money wise. She picked up the phone and made a call to Jerome Horwitz Elementary to schedule an appointment for an interview.

Pattie Botony had spent most of her life studying botany. She loved plants. She was fascinated by their many uses. Medicine. Nutrition. Lately, she wasn't geting anywhere with her degree, spending it mostly studying at home.

When she stepped into Jerome Horwitz Elementary School, she had to be honest, she hated children. She couldn't stand how noisy and messy they were. Ugh. Yet, she had to get a job so she could have money. If it meant putting up with children for about eight hours a day.

Upon arriving at Jerome Horowitz Elementary, she sighed, feeling disgust as she walked up to the building. She couldn't believe she was sinking to THIS low to a science teacher when she could've been working in a biology lab. Yet they wouldn't hire her. She didn't have enough experience. Upon opening the door, she looked around with her green eyes, searching for Mr. Benjamin Krupp's office.

The children looked miserable. Good. So far so good. Let's hope there weren't any pranksters.

Upon finding Mr. Krupp's office, she reached for the doorknob with a green-painted polished fingers, letting herself in. She was greeted by a rather plain looking secretary.

"I'm here to see Mr. Krupp," Pattie said. "I have an interview with him for the science teacher position."

Miss Anthrope looked her over with her thick glasses, seeing this young new teacher. She gestured to a seat near the principal's door. She picked up the phone and let him know someone was here.

"Um...what was your name again?" asked Miss Anthrope.

"Patricia Botony," she replied.

"A Patricia Botany is here for the science teacher position," she repeated.

Principal Krupp sat at his walnut desk, looking over some papers. Pattie had to admit that Mr. Krupp gave off an air of authority. Something she liked. He clearly didn't take crap from anyone. He hated children.

"Hello, Mr. Krupp," said Pattie. "I'm Patricia Botony."

She held out a hand with green fingernail polish. A vine-like silver ring crawled up her forefinger. Krupp shook her hand, putting on a pleasant face. He frowned for a moment. Patricia Botony. The name sounded vaguely familiar, yet he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He didn't recognize her either.

"Nice to meet you, Miss Botony," he said. "So...may I see your resume?"

"Certainly."

She handed him her resume from her green briefcase. Krupp eyed the young new teacher from head to toe. Clearly, her theme was mostly about plants. Her attire was dominantly green. A hair clip with a pink rose pinned back her orange hair in a bun. She wore a green suit that was decorated with vines with a little rose stuck in her lapel. Her lips were painted red. Her green eyes had light green eye shadow. Her shoes were decorated with flowers.

"So...it says you studied at Piqua University in...Botany and Biology," he read.

"Oh yes," she said. "I have a fascination for plants. They're quite interesting. Not to mention, their needs are quite basic: water, sunshine and tender, loving care. Not to mention, they don't talk or rarely make a mess."

Mr. Krupp arched an eyebrow. OK. She was weird, but he was desperate for a science teacher.

"Any experience?" he asked.

"I have given lectures at Piqua University and wrote papers on the biology of plants."

"Interesting."

"Although, college students tend to be much more quieter than elementary school students."

"You won't have to worry. These kids are quite in the straight and narrow."

Pattie's eyes sparkled. She did like Mr. Krupp...and quite well. He shared quite a passion for hating children.

"Well, you're hired. You can start first thing tomorrow."

"Thank you, Mr. Krupp. I hope you don't mind that I decorate my classroom with some of my plants."

Patricia Botony sat at her desk. Oh yes. Her revenge was going to be completed. She was going to get back at the boy who embarrassed her at her junior. She could still remember the nickname she was called.

 _Fatty Patty._

Yes. Fatty Patty Bologna as she was known in school. She was fat since she was a child. Everyone in school teased her. She had a serious crush on a boy. All she wanted was to go to the dance with him. When she finally had the nerve to ask, he just said "Sure, thing, Patty!"

Just days before the dance went by, she overheard rumors that she was going to get kissed by the boy she liked so much. Even though she had a slightly unease that something was going to happen, she pushed that aside and decided to pick out the nicest dress she had. It was a beautiful dark green with green roses.

It was at that dance, she greeted the boy she liked-only to be met with being sprayed with ketchup and had slices of bologna thrown at her. The laughter filled the whole gymnasium, even by the boy she liked. He had planned this!

"Like I'd ever kiss you, Fatty Patty Bologna!" the boy she liked said, laughing hysterically.

So humiliated, she ran out of the gym, slipping on the bologna and ketchup, hearing the laughter echoing in her ears. She cried all the way home. Fatty Patty had been tricked and betrayed by someone she thought she loved. As she walked home, she vowed revenge. She would get back at them one day.

Since that day, she went on a vegan diet, never touching a carbohydrate or a bologna sandwich ever again. She lost the weight. She was going to show that boy who tricked her that she wasn't Fatty Patty anymore. Interesting that he didn't even recognize her. Maybe he forgot? She was staring right at that fat man with that stupid toupee and he didn't even know who she was.

She took out a notebook that had names crossed out. One of the names on the list read:

BENJAMIN KRUPP.


End file.
